Sad news

Many of you may remember my post a couple of months ago about Kim Shaw, my friend from the mother's forum with cervical cancer. She was a young, single mother battling for her life in the hopes she could watch her son Barrett grow. I arrived home this weekend from an internet-free week on Cape Cod to learn that Kim passed away on Friday.

To those of you who contributed to the card drive, I would like to pass along Kim's words of thanks. Tori, the girl who collected the cards and sent out the package, received this message on her Facebook page just a week before Kim's passing:

"I got the package this week!! You are such a sweet selfless woman!!!!!!!! All the others are pretty awesome too! I am shocked and blessed at who all from the BZ Club joined in! Y'all are thought of and xoxox-ed so much, Mr. Barrett appreciates this so much too ladies! God Bless and love to all you sweethearts!! Thank you for the prayers and thoughts and appreciate many more! XOXOxoxo"

As you can see, she had a very positive attitude and was grateful for the kindness of so many people, even those she had never met. I am sure those who were lucky enough to know her will miss her greatly.

While there is comfort in knowing Kim's pain is over, her 18-month old son Barrett is now left to live his life without that special love only a mother can give. I do not know details about who will receive custody of this sweet little boy, though I am sure Kim had something arranged ahead of time knowing that this was always a possible outcome. According to her obituary, an educational fund has been set up for him. If anyone is interested in making a donation, you can send it to the educational fund for Barrett Cantu at:

Wells Fargo Bank
1101 Buchanan Drive
Burnet, TX 78611

Thank you all again for the generosity and kindness you shared with Kim and Barrett.




"Because I could not stop for death, He kindly stopped for me; The carriage held but just ourselves and immortality." --Emily Dickinson

In other news, the Fall semester starts tomorrow. Believe it or not, it may mean more frequent updates from me, since I'll be glued to a computer at almost all times. Many apologies for the lack of posts this summer, but I chose to spend the time playing with Eily as much as possible. You'll be hearing all about it soon.

A Little Bonus

In addition to the mini-update, I thought I'd offer you all a bonus entry today with the new Eily stats. She had her one year checkup last Friday, and aside from "She's perfect!" here's what Dr. Marcus had to say:

Height: 28.5 inches
Weight: 19lbs 7oz
Head circumference: 18.5 inches (big brains!!)

The poor kiddo screamed through the three shots she had to receive. She calmed down as soon as I picked her up, though, and she even managed to wave bye-bye to Dr. Marcus when he left at the end of the appointment. A huge smile of surprise hit his face when he saw how quickly Eily forgave him for giving her those three shots. Something tells me he doesn't get that kind of reaction from kids on a daily basis. I guess it's just further proof of how awesome our little Smudge is....not that I needed any, of course!

Mini update

Hello all! As usual, I'm way behind with posting. I'm sure you're all asking, "Is Eily's big First Birthday post ready yet?" Unfortunately, all writing and blog preparation has taken a back seat lately. "What could possibly be more important than her birthday?" you ask? Well, nothing, of course! But there are only so many hours in the day, and mine have been taken up by this lengthy kitchen renovation and my summer commitments at the theater.

So here's a quick snippet of what's been going on these past couple of weeks:

- Rehearsals for the production of Woody Allen's "God," which I am directing at The Playmasters.
- Sanding, staining, and polyurethaning of the kitchen floor
- The beginnings of some cabinet building in the kitchen

It doesn't look like a very long list, but those are some very time consuming items!

And the most recent news? After over a month of near-drought conditions, the skies opened yesterday and dumped water on us for the length of the day. And after over a month of resting safely in the neighbor's garage, our unopened boxes of cabinets and appliances were suddenly sitting in huge puddles of water. Yes, you read that correctly. Some (not all, thankfully!) of our cabinets got wet. We may have to replace a few pieces, but thankfully all of the huge money items are fine. We spent the better part of yesterday evening moving everything to dry land (with the help of our awesome neighbor, Mark).

So what was the reaction to the catastrophe? In true J&J style, we kind of shrugged it off and said we'd make it work. Shortly after, the window installer with whom I had set up an appointment for an estimate stopped by and we proceeded to set up the next home improvement project. So on a day that could have been a real downer, we decided to keep the ball rolling and ordered new windows to be installed in September. Life goes on, right?

Anywho, that's a pretty good idea of how things have been going around here. I'm still working on the big birthday project to share with all of you, so bear with me just another week and it will be here.

A friend in need (updated)

**UPDATE** If you would like to participate after reading this post, please email toriellen@gmail.com . The Two Big J's and little e will be out of touch for the next few days, but Tori can provide you with the address to send your cards. Thanks so much everyone! I'm so moved by your support.

I've decided to hold off on Eily's big birthday post until next week, when we are finished with traveling for at least a couple of weeks and I can devote some time to really organizing pics and videos. I promise, the wait will be well worth it!

In the meantime, I wanted to take a couple of minutes to tell you all about the mommy of one of Eily's June birthday buddies, Barrett. Barrett's mom, Kim, was diagnosed with a rare form of cervical cancer while she was pregnant. In fact, if it weren't for her pregnancy, the cancer may have gone unnoticed much longer than it did. Barrett was delivered via emergency c-section at 31 weeks (extremely early for those who aren't aware), in order to get Kim started on treatment for her cancer. Barrett is now a bouncing, active 14 month old, but Kim continues to fight for her life everyday. You can read about her battle in the blog she keeps with her aunt, Fight for Barre.

Recently, Kim was told that the medical center she has been going to for treatments will no longer be treating her because her tumors keep growing. Having lost her job just before her diagnosis, Kim has no medical insurance. Her options are very limited. And perhaps hardest of all, she is raising her amazing little boy on her own. Barrett's father has had very little interaction with his son since his birth, with only minimal visitation on a very irregular basis. I don't know how Kim does it, but she continues to put up a fight. I can't even begin to imagine the amount of courage and faith this young woman must possess to even get out bed each day.

I met Kim through a discussion board on BabyZone.com, an area for moms and moms-to-be to gather and discuss their experiences in parenting. (This is the same place I met Eily's favorite sitter, Casey, and her daughter, Ava.) While those of us in the June 09 Birthday Club have never met Kim in person, we all want to do something to help her to know she is not alone in her struggle. We are planning a card shower for her, and we are inviting anyone who is moved by her story to participate. The plan is to send Kim a box of cards to let her know that there are people out there thinking of her and hoping for her cancer to go into remission. Some of us plan to include gift cards to help her with the day to day costs of raising a little boy on her own while being unable to work. While I'm sure she will appreciate this generosity, I think even the cards alone will bring a big smile to her face.

If you would like to join us in brightening Kim's day and letting her know that even strangers are holding her in their thoughts and prayers, let me know. I can give you the address of Tori, the girl who is organizing the card shower, so you can send her your cards for Kim. Tori will be putting the box together and sending it to Kim on July 15. Thank you in advance for sharing any kind words you have to offer to Kim. You never know how much of an impact your actions can have on someone, even if it's something as simple as sending a card.


I've edited to add a picture of Kim and her sweet son, Barrett:



Thanks again to all of you who have already responded and to those who continue to offer support!

This Old House

Howdy all! I am preparing a big birthday post for Eily, but in the interim, I wanted to offer up some progress photos of the kitchen. Jesse and I (mostly Jesse) have been working our tails off to get this room finished, and while we still have a lot of work ahead of us, the end is at least now in sight! Enjoy!

In the beginning:

These were the walls - wood paneling and wall paper over plaster walls (January).



Ripping out the cabinets and sink.



Tearing down the paneling and plaster and opening up the ceiling (January - February).





Jim helps us run brand new electrical through the entire room (March).



Zak cuts a huge hole in the side of our house! (April)



Andy helps out with the drywall (May).



After 5 months, we finally have walls again!



The giant hole is replaced by the new French door.



Freshly primed walls & ceiling (June).



Paint!



(Yes, it's orange. No, it's not quite the orange we intended. Yes, we've decided to keep it!)

Remember the refrigerator that got shoved into an old pantry by the previous owners? It's gone!



This is how the floor looked on Thursday at 5 p.m.



Floor around 6p.m.



And a side by side of the floor at 5 p.m. v. the floor at 7p.m.

All we have to do now is stain and polyurethane the floor this week so we can start building the cabinets that are currently sitting in boxes in the neighbor's garage. One of these weeks soon we'll be posting the "finished product!"

Weekend Warriors

Okay, rather than focusing on the fact that Eily is only five days away from her first birthday, I'd like to play a little catch up and let you all know what we've been up to. (I'm hoping if I ignore the whole birthday thing, it can't possibly be true that she's already a year old!)

Let's start with a little game I like to call "You Know You Travel A Lot When..."

Here we go. You know you travel a lot when:
- You live out of a suitcase when you're at home.
- You can have yourself, your significant other, and the baby all packed and ready to go for a long weekend trip in under 20 minutes
- Your bags are packed and ready to go 5 days before your next trip (we've been packed since Tuesday for our trip to CT this weekend).
- The cats have learned not to come near the house on Fridays so they won't be corralled and locked inside for the entire weekend.
- You have to check your calendar before going grocery shopping to avoid over-purchasing and leaving a fridge full of food to spoil during your next trip.

And finally...
- The empty weekend on your calendar brings more doubt than relief. Surely, you must have forgotten to write down an important event, and now you have no idea where you're supposed to be!

Alright, I think you get the picture. Rather than wasting your time with lengthy descriptions of the past month+, I offer you this picto-blog of our exploits. We're digging back to the beginning of May to cover some of the items I've been meaning to get to but just haven't found the time.

May 9 Mother's Day
Eily and I spent the day together at the SGK Race for the Cure in Philly with my friend Ashley and her boyfriend, Kevin and her cousin, JoAnn. We woke at 4 a.m. to catch the train. You can read more about the day (including how Ashley and Kevin missed the train) in Ashley's blog.

Team Save Our Ta-Tas

Ashley and Kevin practicing for parenthood - apparently Eily made such an impression that Kevin has requested they have no less than 15 little girls.

May 14-16 Washington, D.C.
In honor of Little Jenn Zuba's visit from the West Coast, we made the trip south for a quick weekend visit.

Riding the Metro (and wearing Liam's authentic Irish cap)

Eily's first trip to the Zoo

Conversing with a meerkat

Jesse was a wee bit frightened by the prospect of running into this guy.


I had no idea flamingos make the same sound as geese!


Jenn meets Eily

Liam goes in for a tackle!

May 23 Meeting Ada!
Ada just returned recently from a year in New Zealand and stopped by to meet the wee lass.

Eily was very excited by the balloon Ada brought for her

May 27 A visit from Grandpa Rick
While passing through on business, Grandpa stopped by and bought Eily her first spaghetti supper


May 30 LBI
Our friends Justin and Alyssa invited us to spend a day at her parents' shore house.

Eily's first swim!

June 4-8 Minnesota trip
Eily took her first plane ride and headed west to meet the Robinette side of the family (and to pay Grandma a long overdue visit).

Underwater Adventure with a fellow BabyZone Junebug (Rosalynn) and her mommy (Jen) and big brother (Brady - who didn't want to join us for the picture).

Hanging out with Grandma Mary.

Too squirmy to sit for a picture with Auntie Kiki.

June 11-13 Back to D.C.!
This time Nathan was our excuse to shack up at the Shilliday house again.

Playing with her BFF Liam.



Hey, what app is that? Sweet, I'll have to download it too!

June 18-20 Saratoga, NY
We headed north to meet Eily's newest friend - Rory!

Introducing Rory Evangeline Adams - isn't she sweet!

Eily's first parade in downtown 'Toga.

Kelsey and Kevin getting some practice

Jim: The Ultimate Baby Daddy

June 22

We have pig tails!

June 24 Part I of Auntie Kiki's gift for Eily

Handmade onesies made just for Eily!

Check out the backs of these two!

As you can see, life is crazy around here! We've traveled every weekend since Memorial Day, and the trend hasn't stopped despite all the other things we have going on here at home. This weekend we'll be hitting our first Celtic festival of the year, then driving up to CT to celebrate Eily's birthday with my family. Jesse and I will both be getting tattoos on Saturday in honor of our big girl while she spends some time with Nana and Auntie Katie (and James and Victoria, too!). Then next week it's off to Virginia/West Virginia to do some 4th of July camping with the Shillidays and Rich & Amy.

Stay tuned for updates on Eily's birthday party and first camping trip, as well as kitchen updates as we near completion!